作者 :  忠 义

  What the Baby Wants
  I was travelling in a bus yesterday. Sitting opposite me(在我对面)was a lady with a small child, and the little boy was crying bitterly.
  In vain(无效)the mother tried to calm(使平静)the boy, and at last the gentleman sitting next to her said angrily,“Oh, how that child cries!Why don’t you let it have what it wants?”
  “I would if I could,” replied the mother quietly,“but he wants your funny hat.”
  Leading Questions
  Teacher:Billie, what does C-A-T spell?
  Billy:I don’t know, Sir.
  Teacher:What does your mother keep to catch mice?
  Billy:A trap(捉鼠夹), Sir.
  Teacher:No. What animal is fond of milk?
  Billy:The baby, Sir.
  Teacher:You stupid! What was it that scratched(抓破)your sister’s face?
  Billy:My nails(指甲),Sir.
  Teacher:You’re putting me out of patience(失去耐心)!Do you see that animal in the yard? Then tell me, what does C-A-T spell?
  Billy:Kitten(小猫), Sir.
  A Good Idea
  The boss arrived at his office with a terrible headache.“That’s funny, boss,”commented an employee(雇员).“A few days ago I had a terrible headache too, but it didn’t last long. My wife pulled me over the sofa, gave me a big hug and a kiss. My headache went away.”
  The boss put on his hat.“That must be a good idea. I’ve tried everything else.”he muttered(嘀咕).“Is your wife home now?”

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