“Today my heart beat 103000 times. My blood traveled 168000 miles. I breathed 23000 times. I inhaled 438 cubic feet of air. I spoke 4830 words. I moved 750 major muscles. I used 7000000 brain cells.”
“No wonder you’re so tired.”
（注：inhale 吸入；cubic feet 立方英尺；major，较大的，较多的，主要的；muscle肌肉；brain cell 脑细胞；no wonder 难怪）
An old lady from the country visited her rich city grandson. He took her to his fiftieth-storey flat and showed her around.“Well， Granny，”he asked，“What do you think of it?”
“Never have to worry about floods，”said the old lady.
（注：flat 楼层，套房；show sb. around 领某人参观；floods 洪水）
“Where do you bathe， little girl?”
“In the spring.”
“I didn’t ask when――I said where.”
A little boy was running in the park and lost his mother. After a while， he met a policeman and asked:“Excuse me，but did you happen to see a lady without a boy like me?”
A man took his son to a restaurant， and both ordered steak.
The boy heard his father say to the waiter，“Well done.”“Why are you praising the waiter?”he asked.“He hasn’t even brought the steaks yet.”
(注：steak 牛排；well done①干得好；②煮透些，烧烂些)